Hey, is Gossip Girl turning into a daytime soap? Car accidents, mistresses, political scandals, good kids gone bad, love triangles, moms back from the dead… all signs point to yes!  Here’s what went down…

Jenny Humphrey & Eric van der Woodsen
SO TIRED OF THESE TWO.  So they’re still rivals, I guess, but they’re really boring about it.  Jenny gets some rare designer handbag, so Eric has some cute dark-haired girl named Sawyer get it too, to piss Li’l J off and make her look bad in front of the minions when she tells Sawyer to get rid of it.  But then Jenny buys everyone rare designer handbags and everyone’s happy.  Then Eric and Jenny make up and its SO BORING.  But are they made up for good?

The end of the ep sees Jenny out on the town with Damien, the drug-dealing son of an ambassador.  It seems Li’l J’s been dealing drugs!  So stoked.  She’ll look helluv cute in juvie.

Dan Humphrey & Vanessa Abrams

So Dan is STILL crushing on Vanessa and isn’t sure what to do.  She invites him up on a weekend getaway with her and her new bf Paul Hoffman and some cute girl named Willa Weinstein, but he can’t decide whether to go.  Buddy Nate Archibald suggests he either a) confess his feelings or b) start up with some random college hook-ups.  Dan tries b), by trying to hook up with Willa (wearing gold lamé!) but it just don’t feel right and he stops.

On to a)!  In a moment of high emotion, Dan tells Vanessa he loves her.  “I love you, too,” she says, but in a BFF way.  He starts explaining himself, but she stops him and tells him people say things they don’t mean when under stress, and basically brushes him off.

Though pretentious and terrible, Vanessa’s not stupid.  Babe knows what’s going on.  Is she totally over Dan? Will she be ready to address the issue after she’s thought things through?  Eh, can’t say that I care.

Serena van der Woodsen & Trip van der Bilt
Serena’s shacking up with Trip at the family’s country estate, acting like such a teenager.  Zomg where’s the wifi, where’s the TV wah wah wah.  Meanwhile, Trip gets a phone call and tells S he’s off to meet with grandfather.  But guess where he goes?  Off to see wife Maureen!  It seems Maureen is okay with him seeing Serena privately, as long as they’re together publicly - she thinks this fling is just a phase.  Maureen then tells Trip she’d like to speak with Serena, which he agrees to because he’s sooooo spineless.

So Maureen talks to Serena and basically lays it all out for her: “You can have him in private, but I get him in public…I’m Jackie, you’re Marilyn.”  She whips out the letter from Serena’s dad Keith van der Woodsen as blackmail - if S doesn’t agree to the plan, she’ll tell Rufus what’s in that note, which is essentially something about mother Lily and Keith spending the night in a hotel room together while she was supposedly at CeCe’s.

Serena is freaked out and calls mommy, telling her she wants to go home, everything is horrible.  Lily promises her she’ll tell Rufus everything.  Serena starts leaving to find a cab, right as Trip comes home.  Serena’s super pissed at him and wants to leave.  He convinces her to let him drive her back, which she agrees to - but no talking, plz.

BOOM CRASH POW!  Trip swerves to hit a pack of wolves (Wtf? Twilight crossover wolves?) and crashes the car.  Serena is hunched over the dashboard, blood spilling from her dome.  Trip gets out of the car, unscathed, and calls Maureen.  Maureen waves her magic PR wand and ding!  Serena has been transferred to the driver’s seat and is now the lone car crash survivor and is rushed to the hospital.

But Nate knows everything!  He had been on his way to the country estate to see Serena when he came across the accident.  Nate confronts cousin Trip in front of the hospital, and after Trip responds like a wuss, Nate punches his lights out!  So awesome.  P.S. Do people still say “punch his lights out”?  I hope so. 

Lily rushes to the hospital to see Serena, and tells her that she still hadn’t told Rufus about the letter, which bums her out. Lily leaves to tell confront the situation, but unfortunately, she’s too late: Maureen has already gone to Rufus with the note.  We later see him meeting one of the trophy wives he’d met earlier in the episode at a bar - he needs to talk to someone who can relate.  Get it?  Rufus is a trophy husband who’s been tossed aside!

Serena wakes up in the middle of the night and sees Nate asleep in a chair and her room.  This makes her happy.  Love is blooming!

Chuck Bass and the Ghost of Bart Bass
Finally, a Chuck Bass storyline we can sink our teeth into!  So basically, it’s the anniversary of Chuck’s father Bart’s death, and so he keeps imagining the old-timer everywhere.  Bart is constantly over Chuck’s shoulder, criticizing his business deals and telling him he’s gone “soft” because he’d let gf Blair Waldorf into his heart.

Obv, this causes Chuck to act like a huge dick to Blair, who keeps trying to comfort him on his day of grief.  Dude keeps pushing her away, but she understands what’s going on and is persistent.

On his way to an important meeting, Chuck gets a call about step-sis Serena’s accident and asks his driver to turn the car around to the hospital.  Of course, Bart shows up and tells him he sucks, he’s gonna lose the deal.  Chuck manages to disregard dad and heads to see his fam.

At the hospital, Chuck relives the scene of  his father passing away - seeing Bart on his deathbed, being overwhelmed with emotion, and rushing past Lily and Serena out the door.  Chuck panics and collapses on the hospital floor.  Blair comes out to talk to him and tells him he’s strong, that he had grown up to be the man his father never was - someone who cared about people and confronted his emotions.

Chuck takes Blair’s words to heart and decides to visit his father’s grave - and is met with a strange woman at the gravestone, who calls out “Charles!” and runs off.  Confused, Chuck approaches the grave and finds a locket with an “E” and a picture of Bart on it.

HELLO!  This is clearly Chuck’s mother, am I right?  His mom’s name had been Evelyn (E locket!), she’d brought yellow flowers (mom’s fave!), and Blair had mentioned Chuck had never been to her gravesite because Bart thought it was morbid for children to visit cemeteries.  Basically, Evelyn Bass is alive, right?

We’ll find out… when?  It’s unclear when Gossip Girl will return from winter hiatus, but I hear it may not be until March.  Sheesh!  Way too long!

I’ve enjoyed these past two episodes.  Don’t quit on me now, Gossip Girl!  xoxo!

Who, dudes! Get this: Aaron Tveit, the dude who plays Trip van der Bilt on Gossip Girl, auditioned to play Finn Hudson on Glee!

Casting footage was posted on ONTD.  Aaron’s bit is at around 0:45….dude with the faux hawk:

I love the “I want Midwestern looking kids, not little Abercrombie models” comment that follows his reading.  I think they did good in casting Cory Monteith instead, he’s so… plain looking.  Aaron looks too much like a cartoon, and besides, isn’t he playing a 26-year-old on Gossip Girl?  Guess his age range spans 16-26, depending on hairdo.

Woo woo Glee fever, woo!

Oh man!  Finally, a Gossip Girl that kept me titillated at each turn!  We celebrated Thanksgiving a week late this year with a bit o’ Upper East Side hijinx…

Jenny Humphrey and Eric van der Woodsen
So basically, Eric’s bad now and it’s surprisingly not annoying.  At Thanksgiving dinner, Jenny finds out that it was in fact Eric who sabotaged her at the debutante ball, costing him his relationship with Jonathan.  Jenny attempts to call a truce, but Eric (in a pretty pimp ‘welcome to the dark side’ speech) tells her they’ve both changed and their ain’t no turning back on evil.  This means war!  The end of the ep sees Eric texting someone (probably that bleh Kira Abernathy girl?) to let them know it was time to pounce on Li’l J.

Blair and Eleanor Waldorf

So Blair’s got abandonment issues and is convinced mother Eleanor is keeping a secret from her.  After accosting long-suffering maid Dorota in the hallway and insisting she look into her shopping bag, Blair finds a pregnancy test and is convinced her mother is pregnant.  In the end it turns out it’s Dorota who’s knocked up - with doorman Vanya’s baby!  Our sweet maid is concerned with how her Polish family will react to her canoodling with someone from the Soviet out of wedlock (as a Polish gal myself, I can relate). P.S. How cute will this li’l dumpling of a baby be?!  So excited!

Eleanor’s secret?  She and Cyrus Rose are moving to Paris!  Blair is left alone to make her mark on New York.

Dan Humphrey, Vanessa and Gabriella Abrams
Snooze!  So Dan’s giving Vanessa the googly eyes on account of he’s been crushing on her ever since they had that grody threesome with Olivia Burke.  Meanwhile, Vanessa’s being a bitch to mother Gabriella on account of mom cares more about saving baby whales and condescending to the working class and stuff than her own daughter.  Dan succeeds in reuniting mother and daughter by explaining to Gabriella that she sucks at being a mom.  Mom and daughter leave to meet up with Paul (new theater guy Vanessa’s seeing off-screen) and his parents.

But not before Dan confesses his budding romantic feelings for Vanessa to Gabriella!  A mother knows, you guys, and like I said, Dan’s feelings are written all over his googly face.  Gabriella advises the boy to only pursue Vanessa if he truly knows his feelings for her are true.  “If you break her heart again, your friendship won’t survive,” Gabriella tells him.  OoooOooh!

Rufus Humphrey, Lily van der Woodsen, and CeCe Rhodes
Even though the Humphreys love Thanksgiving, Lily van der Woodsen wants to keep it small and low key.  Rufus and Eric, however, decide to video-conference in grandma CeCe, on account of she’s been sick and they want to surprise Lily.  They soon find out that she’s in perfect health, and the broad basically invites herself over for din, knowing something’s up.

By the end, we discover that Lily is in fact keeping a secret from Rufus.  It turns out CeCe’s cancer has been in remission since August, and Lily has been using her mother as an excuse to be away from home.  When Rufus confronts her about it, she lies again, telling him she was bonding with her mother and didn’t want to leave, though she knew it was unfair to him.  Rufus buys it, but Lily reveals to CeCe that she’s keeping a secret from him that she’ll never reveal. $10 says it has to do with Keith van der Woodsen and that letter she’s hiding from daughter Serena.

Serena van der Woodsen and Trip van der Bilt
Serena is STILL crushin’ on Trip, but is nervous about getting affectionate with him until his divorce with wife Maureen goes through. She’s super dumb, however, and invites him to spend Thanksgiving with her in her hotel room, telling mom Lily that Trip has her working at a soup kitchen for the holiday.

Unfortunately for S, Lily runs into Maureen on the street (wearing the same coat!) and invites both Trip and her to Thanksgiving to relieve Serena of her philanthropic duties.  Maureen accepts the invitation, knowing something’s up.

Meanwhile, Serena is doing her best trying to avoid Trip, but ends up making out with him in her hotel elevator after pulling the emergency brake.  Stupid S seems to have forgotten that step-brother Chuck Bass owns the hotel, and has access to the security tapes.  Chuck tells buddy Nate Archibald about said tapes and Nate, perhaps selfishly out of love for Serena, gets his hands on the footage and shows it to Maureen.  Shizz ends up hitting the fan over Thanksgiving dinner, and Maureen blows up at T and S, telling Serena to end it (”He’ll be a political joke and you’ll be a punch line,” she says).

A freaked out Serena apologizes to Maureen, promises to never see Trip again, and accepts BFF Blair’s invitation to visit Paris with her.  When the girls go to find Serena’s passport in Bart Bass’s old safe, they find a letter addressed to Serena from dad Keith van der Woodsen.  Serena is shocked by its contents!

Trip shows up at that moment and asks for her hand again, and Serena decides to go with him, with Blair’s support.  Not really sure why, btw - his speech was like negative moving.  On their way out, Lily tries to stop her daughter, but whatever S found out in Keith’s letter inspires her to throw the note in Lily’s face and say “You don’t get to judge me, ever again” and walk off.  Lily takes the note and hides it in her coat pocket, to keep it from Rufus.

Nate tries to stop Serena from getting into the car with Trip, asking her to give him a chance.  She’s torn for a second, but in the end, gets in.  Uh oh, methinks trouble will be afoot!

Maureen is still at the van der Woodsen house and dejectedly goes to the closet to pull on her coat and leave.  In the elevator out, she reaches into her pockets and discovers… the Keith van der Woodsen letter!!!  She’s mistakenly put on Lily’s identical coat!  As Maureen reads the letter, an evil smile comes over her face.  She now has some sort of ammunition against Serena.  Oh noes!

Phewf.  Okay, so that’s that.  I’m wondering if everyone else enjoyed the episode as much as I did.  Sure, the story was as disjointed as ever and plots were thrown at us a mile a minute - but we got some great story development in there.  And I can’t wait to find out what all these secrets are!

What do you think?  xoxo!

Mah mah mah Gossip Girl mah mah Gossip Girl had a Lady Gaga cameo last night!  Otherwise, same ole confusing shizz.  Read on…

Jenny Humphrey
So Jenny’s semi-stepbrother Chuck Bass had to entertain this dude named Damien, the son of an ambassador that was staying at his hotel.  He was easily able to pawn off the duty on Jenny on account of she’s soooo bored now that she’s soooo popular.  Jenny takes Damien out on the town and soon finds out he’s a drug dealer, which seemed to somewhat interest her.

That night, they go to a club to pass of some drugs (ecstasy, I believe?) to a customer - then Damien suggests that Jenny go into the bathroom to “test the merchandise.”  Just as the round li’l pill lands in her hand, Chuck walks in to bust up the scene.  “Dude, I’m Chuck Bass,” he tells the Belgian. “Even Europeans must know what that means.”

Saved by Chuck Bass!  Which is funny, because Li’l J had to be saved FROM Chuck Bass back in the first season (remember how he like, tried to rape her?!).  Jenny later admits to Chuck that she’s bored now that she’s Queen Bee.  He warns her to watch out - acting out out of boredom is trouble (he should know!).  Jenny retreats to her room and sends Damien a text: “That was fun.  Let’s do it again some time.”

UH OH!  Foreshadowing!  Jenny’s spiraling out of control!  FINALLY, some excitement.

Serena van der Woodsen, Nate Archibald, and Trip van der Bilt
Serena is STILL crushing on Trip, and goes to Nate for advice.  She doesn’t think she can control herself around Trip (a married man!) and is too stupid to realize cutting of contact with him is the simplest solution.  Nate decides to help her out by taking her on an epic bar crawl (wtf?) to keep her busy until Trip leaves on his trip (ha!) to D.C.

In the meantime, Trip finds out that it was his wife Maureen who staged the Hudson River rescue from a few episodes back and is super upset.  He turns to the bottle and then goes out to find Nate and Serena at the Brandy Library, where they are reminiscing about the time they did it at the Shepherd wedding and about to smooch.  Trip explains how upset and confused he is with the Maureen sitch, and asks Serena to go on a walk with him.  Nate warns S that if she leaves with Trip, they’ll definitely cross the line. “That line just got a little blurry,” she responds, which totally isn’t true, cuz dude is still a married Congressman, after all.

Blair Waldorf and the Post-Threesome Trio
Things are kinda awkward between Dan Humphrey, Olivia Burke, and Vanessa Abrams after the three of ‘em did it last week.  Dan and Vanessa are awk, Vanessa and Olivia are avoiding each other, things aren’t right. Tsk, tsk!  “The third person is supposed to be a stranger,” Nate scolds Dan.

Meanwhile, Blair is trying to dominate another social scene by getting in with the Tisch theater kids by participating in their cabaret event.  She enlists Olivia to help her out, and Olivia enlists Dan to write the play to help him get involved in teh creative writing program.  The cabaret turns out to be the same night as the Morrissey concert Dan and Vanessa are supposed to go to, and Olivia lies to V and tells her they had been planning to participate in the cabaret in the past month.

Vanessa later finds about the lie, and weasels her way into directing the play.  This leads to rivalry/aggression between the two girls, and both end up quitting.  Sneaky Blair, however, figures out that they’ve just had a threesome (“The third person is supposed to be a stranger!” she scolds Dan) and blackmails the girls into participating in the play, unless they want news of their threesome publicized.

The show must go on!  It’s cabaret night, and Dan’s crappy play is LIVE!  His modern retelling of Snow White apparently casts him as a hot shot record producer/Prince Charming, Olivia as an aspiring chanteuse, Blair as the evil stepmother, and Blair’s minions as a boy band.  Seriously, you guys, how embarrassing were the minions as the boy band?  Oy.

At intermission, Olivia confesses to Dan what’s bothering her: whilst threesome-ing, she realized that Dan and Vanessa love each other.  Dan totally denies it, but it seems like he’s taken her words a bit to heart - he now sees Vanessa through fresh eyes.

When the play returns, Olivia purposefully misses her cue on stage, knowing that Blair will push Vanessa on stage for the final scene: Prince Charming’s kiss with Snow White.  Vanessa indeed steps in for the rest of the play.  Dan plants a kiss on the babe, and…. sparks fly?  I can never tell with these two. They’re such losers.

The episode ends with a goodbye: Olivia has decided to take a role in The Bitches of Eastwick (Olivia: “It’s like Heathers, but with witches”), and will be gone for the rest of the semester.  Vanessa tells her that she doesn’t have feelings for Dan and that one of the more pretentious Tisch dudes likes he so whaeva.  Obviously, O doesn’t buy it.  Bye bye, Hilary Duff story arc!  And Lonely Boy stands alone?

The play is a hit among the obviously stupid Tisch kids (again, isn’t this bad PR for NYU?), Dan might be getting a boost into the creative writing program, and Blair has seemingly earned their respect.  Blair then one-ups everyone by using stepfather Cyrus Rose’s connections to get the kids into a Lady Gaga dress rehearsal.  Wallace Shawn was the inspiration for “Poker Face,” btw.

The Lady Gaga cameo was totally random and out of place, but so’s everything on this trainwreck of a show.  Where once I saw art (a modern retelling of The Age of Innocence!), I now see pure entertainment.  And I’m okay with that.  I used to watch Dynasty with my grandmas, after all.

At least we got a few new plots in the mix!  A Trip/Serena/Nate love triangle, a blossoming Dan/Vanessa romance, Jenny Humphrey gone wild, Blair begins her domination and…. Chuck?  Poor Chuck has been the absent boy scout in the few episodes, and I’m tired of it!

What, is Ed Westwick off shooting a movie or something?

BRING BACK CHUCK BASS!

OM3! Last night was the much-publicized Gossip Girl threesome, and let me tell you, it wasn’t pretty.  Let’s start the rundown.

Jenny Humphrey
So basically, Li’l J’s still being a huge bitch, ordering her minions around and scheming to remain Queen Bee.  But don’t worry, you guys, she’s only a crappy person cuz she’s insecure on the inside.  See, J is from Brooklyn, and thus way behind on things like ballroom dancing and wearing skirts that reach past her the fingertips.  Luckily, stepmother Lily van der Woodsen has pulled some strings, and Jenny is able to make her debut at cotillion along with the other Upper East Siders. Insecure about her lack of experience being rich, Jenny decides she needs to have an A+ date to the deb ball, namely, some dude named Graham Collins.  Unfortunately, her minions are having some trouble pinning the guy down.

Newly-scheming stepbrother Eric van der Woodsen, pretending to be helpful, convinces her to go to the ball with his boyfriend Jonathan (no clue why she would agree).  He then swipes Li’l J’s phone and texts “No, thanks” to Graham Collins‘ actual invitation to the dance on Jenny’s behalf.

However, Jenny finds out what Eric did and, in turn, dumps Jonathan as her date and Blair Waldorf as her pseudo-mentor (J: “Your era’s over. And so is that headband”).  This incites Eric and Blair to team up, and they do so by taking in this babe named Kira Abernathy with a seriously busted face (did she win a walk-on role sweepstakes?) and making her over to become the new Queen Bee.  Eric even blackmails hottie Graham Collins to go with her, by telling him that what happens at Camp Suisse doesn’t necessarily stay at Camp Suisse (scandal!).

The plan is as follows: when each girl debuts, Jenny will take the stage thinking Graham is her escort, and then be publicly humiliated when she discovers this isn’t the case - and she actually has no date to her society debut.  So this basically happens, and sure, it’s pretty mortifying - but it’s not really a biggie on account of Li’l J makes a quick call to Nate Archibald and he comes a-runnin’ to join her on stage for the debut.  BORING!  But hey, you think these two will rekindle their near-romance?

BONUS: Boyfriend Jonathan is nonplussed by Eric’s deviant behavior (shock me shock me shock me!) and dumps the dude.  Bummer!  This just means Eric‘ll have more time to scheme with busted-faced Kira.  “The next time we take Jenny down,” he tells her, “It will be for good.”  Cute!

Serena van der Woodsen and Blair Waldorf
These former besties are still feuding, and Chuck Bass is tired of it.  Thus, he schemes to trap Serena and Blair in an elevator, where they will remain until they make up (what is this, an ABC sitcom?).  So they do, and Serena opens up to Blair about her daddy issues and blah blah blah while Blair listens in with an uncharacteristically sympathetic ear.  Serena also tells her about her crush on Senator Trip van der Bilt, Nate’s cousin and Serena’s recent employer.  She admits that things between them are getting a little too personal - Trip admitted as much to her earlier that day.  Blair recommends that she quit and never see Trip again; dude is a married Congressman after all!  Serena agrees, and marches down to his office to resign then and there.

Unfortch, when Serena finds Trip, she is distracted by his boyish good looks and is easily convinced that the two of them can manage to keep things professional.  I think we all know where this is headed.

Dan Humphrey, Olivia Burke, and Vanessa Abrams
On with the show!  I’ve saved the worst for last!  Yes, I’m sorry, ole greaseface, beefarms, and hemphair make up the trois in our ménage a trois.  After Olivia is notified that she will be soon leaving town to film Endless Knights IV, Dan and Vanessa decide to cram the full college experience into one wild ‘n crazy night, by running through a “15 Things You Have To Do In College” list in 24 hours.

They do a bunch of boring stuff like drink at a party and blah blah blah finally retire to the girls’ dorm room after a full night.  Dan (that dog!) points out that they have one item left to check off: have a threesome.  This leads to the “Have you ever?” question (they hadn’t), which leads to Olivia kissing Dan, Olivia kissing Vanessa, then Vanessa kissing Dan.  Cut to the three of them asleep in bed.  We can all assume what went down, and let’s face it, Vanessa loved every minute.

But Olivia gets a text message as she sleeps: Endless Knights IV is off!  This means she’ll be sticking around after all.  Guess they didn’t have to have that threesome!

Though winding down with a barf, the episode ends with a gasp.  Lily van der Woodsen picks up the mail to find a letter to Serena from Daddy van der Woodsen (Keith, I believe?)!  Will she give the letter to Serena?  Hide it?  Will Serena resolve her ongoing daddy isues?

The Parents Television Council (PTC) tried to keep this week’s episode of Gossip Girl off the air, but why?  “They Shoot Humphreys, Don’t They?” was an anti-threesome ad, if you ask me.  Did you see the trio in question?  Would you want to be involved with any of them?  Gross me out!

Besides, kids don’t even watch this show.  25+-year-olds trying to relive the Bev 90210/OC glory days do.

xoxo!

Does anyone even watch this Gossip Girl show anymore?  This show is getting harder to follow than Queen Mum after a few drinks (that was funny, right?)!

Let’s break it down by character; otherwise, this shizz is way too hard to follow:

Dan Humphrey and Olivia Burke
Olivia for some reason doesn’t want to show bf Dan her appearance on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.  She goes to great lengths to keep footage of the show from him, but he eventually comes across the clip.  It seems Olivia told Jimmy Fallon the story of her first date with Dan, in which he emerged from the bathroom with his shirt on inside-out.  Fallon starts calling him “Bathroom Boy,” it’s hilarious blah blah blah.  Dan ends up not really caring, just being bummed he forgot their one-month anniversary, yadda yadda all is right with the world.

Nate Archibald, Vanessa Abrams, and the Congressional Campaign
Nate’s cousin Trip van der Bilt is running for Congress.  Nate’s helping out while Vanessa documents the whole process for one of her snoozy short films.  She gets footage of Trip saving a drowning man in the Hudson River, but when reviewing the tape before selling it off to a local news station, learns that the whole thing was set up to make Trip look like a hero.  She warns Nate ahead of time so Trip can plan his PR plan of attack ahead of time.  What ends up happening instead is Nate tricking Vanessa into forking the footage over by sending a fake journalist to purchase the tape.  Vanessa later figures it out and gives him one of her b.s. moral authority speeches about how he isn’t the Nate Archibald she once knew.  Nate redeems himself later by taking credit for the whole set up, even though he had nothing to do with it.

BONUS: We all thought it was Grandfather William van der Bilt (p.s. love it how they all call him “Grandfather”), but it turns out to be Trip’s sneaky wife Maureen who was behind the whole shebang.  She confesses this to Grandfather with a shizz-eating grin on her face, because she knows he’s underestimated her in the past.  Grandfather responds that he actually doesn’t think about her much at all.  Disssssss!

Blair Waldorf and Serena van der Woodsen
The girls are still pissed at each other over last week’s snafu with Chuck Bass’s Gimlet bar opening and whatnot.  Blair finds herself a new best friend in the form of some babe named Brandeis whose got a penchant for designer clothes.  Blair takes Brandeis to Trip van der Bilt’s election party at Chuck’s Empire Hotel, where Serena is attending with her new fake boyfriend actor Patrick Roberts, who she is dating only to keep her job as a publicist.  Patrick gets mondo drunk at the party and lets our friends know that Blair’s buddy Brandeis is not only a psych major at NYU, but a high-class call girl - she’s at the party looking for new clients!  Things get crazy, Blair gets drunk-as-a-skunk Patrick kicked out of the party, Serena tells Blair about her new friend’s actual calling in life, Blair gives her one of those takes-one-to-know-one lines, and S pushes B’s face into a cake.

Whew! Serena ends up feeling like a whore after all, quitting her job, and trying to make up with Blair - but Blair won’t have it.  Blair’s got a real life now, with school and a real relationship, while Serena’s floundering through life, alienating her family and friends.  Blair wants no part of it.  Could this be the end of Serena and Blair?!?!?!?

The episode ends with Blair crawling into bed with Chuck - she’s got no friends, but at least she has him, she says - and Serena running into newly-elected Trip at a bar and him joining her for a chat.  Both these scenes seemed foreshadowing to me.  Will Blair lose Chuck too?  Will something happen between Serena and Trip?  I certainly hope both of those questions are answered with a big fat NO.

Next week?  It’s supposed to be the big threesome episode we’ve been hearing buzz about (OM3!).  Who do you think it’ll be?  I’m half-assuming it’ll involve Olivia (you know how loose those Hollywood types are!), but I’m hoping Vanessa will be involved because maybe THEN she’d shut up.  Serena would be too obvious, no?

Maybe our girl Gossip will show up.  xoxo!