Another great episode of Daisy of Love!  Things just keep getting better and better…

Last night, Daisy had the guys head to the kitchen and cook her up an assigned dish, with the help of a few culinary experts.  The assignments:

Chef Flex: Chicken Cordon Bleu
Chef 12 Pack / Dave: Red Velvet Cake
Chef Sinister: Lasagna
Chef Chi Chi: French Onion Soup
Chef Big Rig: Zucchini Quiche (or “Some Zucchini @*$%,” as he referred to it)

The fellas follow their recipes and cooking goes well.  Everyone sat down with Daisy and Riki to chow down and - snooze cruise! - the dishes are voted equally good.  Instead of choosing a clear winner, Daisy wanted to go around the table and have each gent name the competitor (aside from themselves) who was most and least compatible for her.

Chi Chi started out, naming (surprise, surprise!) his little buddy Sinister as Daisy’s best pick, and Big Rig the worst.  Then it’s on to Sinister, who agrees with Big Rig as least compatible, but chooses Flex as best rather than BFF Chi Chi.  This causes Chi Chi to basically lose his shizz and run off to the bathroom crying.  Finally, he’s coaxed back out, and sits back down at the table, where the rest of guys unanimously vote him least compatible and Flex most compatible, basically on account of he’s a huge wuss.  The vote earns winner Flex a solo date with Daisy, and losers Chi Chi and Big Rig a pity date as well.

Then everyone goes out to hang outdoors by the fire and Daisy starts canoodling with 12 Pack / Dave, which sets Sinister off for the rest of the ep, on account of he never gets pulled off to make out.  Sorry you’re ugly, dude.

He later apologizes and gets a sympathy smooch.  Wah wah wah.

The next day, Daisy takes Flex on a solo date, in which they receive an archery lesson from a jolly old man. “I’m a professional bow and arrow person!” quoths Daisy.  The date goes well, Flex opens up, yada yada yada, he’s still my personal #1 pick out of all these chumps.

Then it’s on to the loser date.  Daisy, Big Rig, and Chi Chi sit down for some lunch, where Daisy addresses Chi Chi’s neediness.  Chi Chi responds that he’s just easy-going, and if they were together at a bar and another guy were to buy her a drink, he’d be okay with it on account of it’s good for her self-esteem.  Weird, right?  Big Rig agrees; he lets us viewers at home know that if someone was to buy his girl a drink, they’d better make it two and s his Big Rig d while they’re at it.  Grody!

Then Daisy brings up Big Rig’s violent streak, which he says he has totally under control.  No one seems all that sure.

Elimination time!  Riki advises Daisy to dump either Chi Chi or Sinister, on account of you can’t date BFFs and expect to get close to both of ‘em.  Predictably, Daisy doesn’t follow Riki’s expert advise, and decides to give Big Rig the boot since she’s not really feelin’ it.

Big Rig - aka Jeremiah - leaves the room and starts bursts into tears, collapsing on the floor. “I got f-in’ tears comin’ out of my f-in’ head. That’s real s-t,” he says.  So intense!

Well, we’re down to just four guys, folks!  Let’s get Chi Chi out of here already, he’s starting to bum me out too much.

I’ve gotta hand it to Sunday night’s Daisy of Love - the episode was fantastic.  I’ll give you some of the highlights here…

Predictably, things are tense between Fox and the rest of the guys.  It’s extremely obvious to everyone aside from Daisy that the dude’s got a girlfriend back home, and they are pissed beyond belief that she’s kept him on so long, at the expense of others.

Daisy senses the tension and decides to make the boys some disgusting chocolate chip pancakes.  Yum yum!

No challenge this week, so Daisy takes her men out on some “sexy” dates.  First up is 12 Pack, who’s being rewarded for taking a serious beating from Big Rig during last week’s episode.  They go to a lingerie store and get super drunk and put on ridiculous underwear and costumes and make out for like 5 hours.  Seems to go well.  He asks that she refer to him by his name - “Dave” - so they can really get to know each other. Snooze!

Back home, Chi-Chi and Sinister are scheming to get Fox kicked out.  Chi-Chi comes up with a pretty decent plan: next time someone calls asking for Fox, they tell said caller that Fox got kicked off the show for having a girlfriend, then ask whether they know anything about that.  Brillz!

Flex gets suspicious of the two schemers, so they let both him and Big Rig in on the plan.  The whole house is plotting against Fox!

All the while, Sinister is working on a song for Daisy.  He’s waiting for her in her room when she and 12 Pack come home from their date and enter the bedroom - AWKWARD!  Daisy politely asks 12 Pack to leave, and sits down to hear the most screechy, cringe-worthy song I’ve been exposed to since Heidi Montag gave us a taste of her howling on I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! Buzzkill!

Later on, it’s time for a group date. Chi-Chi, Big Rig, Fox, along with Daisy and our good friend Riki sit down for some spaghetti.  Fox at that moment decides to start telling Chi-Chi that him and Daisy won’t work as a couple because basically, Chi-Chi’s not good looking enough.

At that very moment, karma kicks in, and there’s a phone call.  Sinister picks up and - GET THIS - not only is it a call for Fox, it’s Fox’s girlfriend calling.  Flex runs to get Daisy, who reluctantly gets on the horn.  Fox’s girlfriend lets Daisy know that Fox (a.k.a. Daniel) told her he was going on a hairdressing show, and that they still live together.

Furious, Daisy pulls Fox into the phone room to talk to his ladyfriend in front of her.  In classic Fox style, he strings a bunch of words together, ending the call with “We’re over!”  He then turns to Daisy and strokes her hair, trying to butter her up.  Daisy storms off in tears.

Riki decides to confront Fox about the situation, to which Fox says (seriously, not making this up): “I did live with a girlfriend at the time, when it was my perfect opportunity but knowing the fact that you know I founded Daisy highly astonishing.”  LOVE HIM!

Meanwhile, the boys are all throwing temper tantrums. Fox gets back on the phone with his girl and Big Rig pulls the phone straight outta the wall.  Flex goes around smashing things.

Riki goes to talk to Daisy about the situation, and is stunned to find out she’s considering NOT cutting Fox.  Our babe’s got a lot of thinking to do.

Elimination time! Daisy polls the fellas to see who would stay if she kept Fox.  Everyone says yes, but is extremely confused as to why she would even consider keeping that lying sonofagun.  She tells them she’s not going to make decisions based on popular opinion - which is fair.

(Meanwhile, in a confessional, Fox lets us viewers at home know he’s starting to feel very sympathetic towards himself.)

Daisy then turns to Fox and asks why she should let him stay, to which he responds with a typical Fox jumble.  Daisy cuts him off and, in a beautiful moment of female empowerment, tells him to get the eff out.

Daisy’s decided she’s got to break her old patterns. The boys rejoice!

But Fox has the last word.  His exit interview consists of some pure poetry: “I’m out like sauerkraut, y’know? But, I mean, that doesn’t mean that I’m gone? I’m sorry that, y’know, it had to not end this way, ’cause I know that, y’know, times are endless and, I just wanted to let her know that I’m just so sorry that it had to end this way knowing the fact that this situation had to occur.”

Times are endless, y’all.  Can’t wait for more situations to occur next week.

Last night, on Daisy of Love - which I’ve come to realize is my favorite TV show at the moment, no shame - the guys were pitted against one another in some serious combat: cage fighting.  Luckily for them, Cage (an ACTUAL cage fighter) had excused himself from the show just one week prior, so they were spared some serious damage.

The fellas were split up by weight class to keep the fight fair.  Here’s how it went:

Big Rig vs. 12 Pack: A trained fighter, B.R. easily annihilated his ab-ulous competitor, though 12 Pack put up a pretty decent fight.

Fox vs. Chi-Chi: Fox seemed to be doing okay… for the first 37 seconds, after which he gave up.  He’s a hairdresser, he cuts hair!

Flex vs. 6 Gauge: Flex whooped 6 Gauge’s arse, to no one’s surprise.  Seems the general consensus in the house is that 6 Gauge doesn’t really try at much of anything (including competing for Daisy’s love!).

Chi-Chi vs. Sinister: Chi-Chi pledges he’d never hit his “little buddy,” but after Sinister gets a few good punches in, the Cheechmeister gets him in a choke-hold (no clue if its actually called that btw) and wins the match.  Suck it, little buddy!

In the end, Big Rig wins MVP and gets to go on a private date with Daisy, alone in a bubble bath.  Homeboy gets in the tub and immediately rubs his face in between her breasts, which doesn’t weird her out at all.  We can only assume people do that to her ALL the time.

But what DOES weird her out is when he tells her he’s falling for her and gives her a photo of his son.  Our fair Daisy has got her priorities wrong, methinks.

Otherwise, good date.  Before preparing for her next date - with Chi-Chi, Sinister, and Flex - Daisy goes outside to talk with 6 Gauge, on account of he’s been distant.  He tells her about his days as a stripper, pretending to love the ladies outside of work to get their moneys.  Daisy grimaces and tells him she loved stripping because she’s an entertainer, not for the money.  “I’m not that desperate,” she tells him.

Value judgments from Daisy of Love?!  LOVE IT.

Meanwhile, behind the scenes, Flex and 12 Pack team up to break up “the twins” - their nickname for BFFs/roomies Chi-Chi and Sinister. Flex starts going on and on about how if it were HIM in a competition for Daisy with his best friend, he’d kill him.  You can tell these sneaky mind games are starting to work on Sinister, who’s starting to resent Chi-Chi.

Okay!  So now we’re on our tattoo date and Chi-Chi continues kissing some serious butt and gets Daisy’s lips tattooed on his hip, which annoys Sinister, on account of he had thought up the idea like aaaages ago.  Blah blah Sinister gets the word “sinister” on his wrist, Flex gets a touch-up, yada yada yada am I the only one who doesn’t give a shizz about tats?

Back at the farm, Fox gets a call from his brother, who tells him that his girlfriend had just found out he was on the show and they like, start speaking Pig Latin or something to confuse us viewers at home.  Girlfriend?!  Yup!  Apparently Fox has been living with some babe until leaving for the show.  Unclear as to whether or not he broke it off with her.

Stupid, stupid Fox confides in 12 Pack, who tells him to immediately tell Daisy, which he does.  He really vaguely explains what’s going on, making his story hard to believe.  Luckily for him, Daisy’s too lost in his smoldering good looks to really give a rat’s A.  Besides, she basically did the same thing to Bret Michaels on Rock of Love 2, so she can’t really complain.

In the end Daisy decides to send 6 Gauge home, on account of she’s not really feelin’ it.  Fox is super relieved and tells us folks watching at home, “Honesty is… awesome.”  Well put, Fox.

What do you think, guys?  I, personally, stand by my pick: Flex.  Go home already, Fox!

Welcome back from the long weekend, everybody!

And what better way to dive back into the work week than to discuss Sunday’s Daisy of Love?  Let’s do this!

This episode followed the dudes as they directed a photo shoot to photograph the cover of Daisy’s single “Pretty Messed Up.”  The fellas were broken into two teams and given specific roles: art director, photographer, make-up/hair, model.

Daisy of Album Cover!  Here are the images the two teams came up with:

Not half bad!

It was close, but the punky/pinky shot won out in the end.  Fox was named team MVP regardless of being totally worthless, basically because he smooched it up with Daisy during the shoot and batted his eyelashes while he applied her make-up and trashy hair extensions.  He got to go on a solo date with our gal Daise, wherein he basically said a bunch of stupid, stupid shizz, like how he wants someone who will go out when he says he’s going out and how that makes him say, “Wow.”  You can’t make this stuff up, folks.  Put a lid on it, Fox.

Back at the homestead, Sinister was obviously all butthurt about not winning the MVP solo date for the rest of the ep on account of he came up with the shoot’s concept and look and basically directed the whole thing and everybody involved.  Apparently, Sinister thinks these competitions are based on merit rather than on being hot and flirty, which has been his Achilles’ heel since day one.  Dude might not be the dullest crayon in the box, but he certainly isn’t the sexiest, either.

It’s called Daisy of Love, not Daisy of Talent, loser.

But the show’s biggest stinker (besides a totally awesome skunk who snuck into the house and sprayed it up with stank, prompting 12 Pack to dump a bottle of tomato juice on his chiseled abs!) was Cage, who went totally apeshizz or, as our friend Fox put it, was “furiated” throughout the entire episode.  Homeboy burns Flex, attacks 6 Gauge, then hops back on Flex for a beatdown.  Not even sure exactly what he was so pissed about, to be honest; it was just one big flurry of fury.

Mamma mia!  Daisy of Anger Management Issues!

Cue testimonials from Cage ’bout how he had it so rough growing up that all he knows is fightin’.  Blah blah blah. He spends the end of the episode weeping it up (seriously, guy shoulda gotten one of those single-tear face tattoos rather than the weird tribal shizz he came up with) and H2Hing with Daisy about how he doesn’t think he can stay in the house without hurting someone.  In the end, Daisy and Cage decide he should leave, and thus, no one is sent home that night.

ANOTHER night of voluntary eliminations?  Why, I never!  I think it’s safe to say Daisy’s feeling pretty crappy about herself, as no one can get it together for long enough to try to win her love.  She leaves the room crying.  AGAIN.

IMHO, all this voluntary bouncing is sort of fun.  Adds some twists and turns, speeds up the show… and besides, you expect us to believe all these dudes would be into Daisy after seeing that pucker up close?  Love the honesty, fellas!

Oh, and in case you were interested, following the departure of my boy London (boo!), I’m throwing my support behind a new candidate.  He’s not entirely dumb as bricks, and he’s handsomer than the others… he’s Flex!:

Daisy of Eyeliner, it’s Flex FTW!

Step it up, dude!