January 27th, 2012, 12:35 PM
Emmy committee, you might as well just give Kim her Emmy now…
Kim Kardashian, like many reality TV stars, is a bit of a conundrum. As we all know, reality shows along the lines of Keeping Up with the Kardashians are pretty far from “reality,” with producers and behind the scenes editors coaching out intriguing twists and manufacturing easy to publicize drama. And on the show Kim “acts” all the time. Are we really supposed to believe she had a heart to heart with her mom about whether its normal to not want to see your husband? Obviously not, it was a scene created to play up her divorce. She was acting. So then why is she so terrible at acting acting? We’re going to find out if her years on reality TV have helped her improve at all when she joins the cast of Drop Dead Diva for a multi-episode story arc. Well, someone will find out, because it’s on Lifetime, and no way in the world am I watching something on that channel. Except for Project Runway, because Tim Gunn is awesome. And that new Rob Lowe Lifetime movie where he has a bad mustache and says “I’m untouchable, bitch.” That kind of looks great as well. Ok fine, I watch Lifetime, I admit it.
Now, if I can, let me speak directly to Kim: Kim, oh Kim, why are you doing this? Do you really think you’re going to become a legitimate actress one day? Who could possibly ever see past the fact that you’re Kim Kardashian? I hardly think you’re going to start disappearing into your roles like Meryl Streep or something. If you were in the Iron Lady you better believe Margaret Thatcher would have had a bedazzled iPhone, said “like” a lot and worn much shorter skirts. Here’s the thing Kim, you are great at many things. Getting paid to go to clubs, getting paid to lend your name and face to products you would never use (come on, a clothing line at Sears?!), getting paid to be yourself on TV, getting paid to get married on TV, getting paid to talk about your divorce on TV, getting paid to wear very little in men’s interest magazines, etc. You know what you’re not so hot at? Things that require talent. I think your first acting gig in Disaster Movie (even you can admit that was a…well,that joke writes itself) and your not so hit single Jam prove that you should steer clear of things that talented people do, like act and sing. You’re Kim Kardashian, you are in the business of being Kim Kardashian. That’s all anybody wants out of you.