May 16th, 2011, 03:39 PM
I hope he’s holding out for Pope Trump
I have sad news everyone: it seems Donald Trump won’t be pursuing the White House with a Presidential run. Awwwww. That was going to be extremely entertaining. Much to the chagrin of late night comedians everywhere, Trump issues a statement today saying he would love to run for President, but he simply couldn’t because he has to stick with his first love: business. I’m going to assume all his ex-wives got very similar form letters. And if so I assume that means Trump will soon be running for President in a younger, thinner country.
It probably comes as no surprise that Trump made his big announcement during the week leading up the the Celebrity Apprentice season finale. After all, no matter how many “birthers” or tea partiers he duped into thinking he was a viable candidate who wanted to fight the “socialist” Obama administration, this was always about the publicity. Trump trolled the media and the entire country by proclaiming himself Obama’s chief rival and got himself and his TV show a heck of a lot of press because of it. There are a lot of very rich men out there, men even richer than Trump, but there’s a reason why he has made headlines for decades even before he had a TV show. Trump is a larger than life character who early on picked a persona and decided to milk it for all it was worth in the media, and at this point he’s essentially a caricature of the shrewd business man he once was. I found it hard to believe that a growing number of Republicans viewed a living cartoon character who hosts a reality TV show as a viable candidate, but I guess that’s where the birth certificate entered the picture. He picked one fringe issue with a very loud group behind it and assigned himself as their leader, assuring himself their support no matter how much his economic plans would harm them. I’ve gotta admit, he’s a smart dude! He really throws you off by having such a dumb haircut.
But hey, we still get our share of Trump on the Celebrity Apprentice! Because I really actually enjoy him on that show. He’s pretty entertaining.