9021-Oh, yesss! The Real Housewives franchise is headed to one of the ritziest cities in this great nation of ours: Beverly Hills!

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills will premiere on Thursday, October 14th, at 10/9c on Bravo. Will it live up to the drama of its predecessors, The Real Housewives of New Jersey (plus table-throwing) or The Real Housewives of Atlanta (plus hair-pulling catfights)?

Well, being based in a city that thrives on *sing-song* DRA-maaa may help, and the Beverly Hills Housewives cast is definitely way more connected to the entertainment industry. You may recognize some of the cast members:

Camille Grammer is best known as the ex-wife of actor Kelsey “Frasier” Grammer. The couple divorced this year, but have two children and co-own the production company responsible for TV show like Medium and The Game.

Kim Richards was a child actress probably best known for starring in the 1970’s Disney kid flicks, Escape to Witch Mountain and Return from Witch Mountain. Kim’s now a single mother of four, has retired from acting and is working on a jewelry line and a water bottle line. She is the sister of fellow cast mate, Kyle Richards, and aunt to Nicky and Paris Hilton.

Kyle Richards, the aforementioned sister of Kim and also aunt of Paris and Nicky Hilton, has been acting since childhood. Besides acting, she’s married with four children and is an avid cancer advocate.

Taylor Armstrong is the wife of a venture capitalist and has one child. She owns an SAP firm and likes to “work hard, play hard.”

Adrienne Maloof’s family owns the Sacramento Kings, the Los Angeles Kings and the Palms Casino Resort in Las Vegas (dang!). She is married to a plastic surgeon and is involved in several charities.

Lisa VanderPump is originally from England and has been living in America for the last five years. She owns two popular restaurants in LA and writes for a local lifestyle magazine.

[source: TVGuide]

Mmm, the scent of spray-tans and botox is thick! If you want to get a whiff of it, tune in to Bravo on October 14th to catch the premiere of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills!

Stars?

Dancing with the Stars (otherwise known as Dancing with…wait, who? REALLY?) has confirmed the cast for the upcoming season.  Square Eyes already brought you a post bemoaning (or praising) the leaked contestants, being babymama Bristol Palin, sax man Michael Bolton, former baller Rick Fox, comedienne Margaret Cho, actress Jennifer ‘Baby’ Grey, Jersey Shore’s Mike ‘The Situation’ Sorrentino, pop singer/killer car crash causer Brandy, and one Mr. David Hasselhoff (no introduction needed).  Just announced additions to the cast include The Brady Bunch mom Florence Henderson (the obligatory older woman), Disney child actor Kyle Massey (everyone over twelve, say it with me now: who?), retired Arizona Cardinals quarterback Kurt Warner (obligatory football player), and, last but not least, Audrina Patridge, late of that seminal television program The Hills.  Wow.  Maybe the ‘Stars’ in the title now refers to the professional ballroom dancers these people will partner.

My question is, when will a Real Housewife of [Wherever] be on the show?  Or a Kardashian sister?  So many untapped resources, and DwtS goes for the likes of Bristol Palin, Michael Bolton and Kyle Massey?  I mean, The Situation must’ve lowered his salary requirements to go on the show, so surely ABC can afford a housewife or two.  The Real Housewives of New York are so steamed about the cast of Jersey Shore getting $30k an episode (!!) that they won’t commit to a fourth season unless their salaries are raised.  Currently, each wife makes about $4k per episode (same as the real  New Jersey housewives), and, according to a source close to the women, “they have little choice but to pimp themselves out with side gigs to bump up their earnings.”  There were eighteen episodes in Season 3—that’s a total of $72k before taxes.  And aren’t these women supposed to be the idle rich?  Why do they care what they get paid?  OH RIGHT—because they’re not rich.  They’re just upper middle class poseurs.  Meanwhile, the Jersey Shore kids are laughing all the way to the bank, and the Real Housewives of New Jersey are beating the stuffing out of each other, and host Andy Cohen, on their reunion show.  Check it out:

Ok, ok, I promise: no more housewives stuff!  Starting Thursday: Project Runway talk!  Don’t make Tim Gunn angry!

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Oh, foreshadowing!!

The Hills may be over and gone, but Spencer ‘Flesh Colored Beard’ Pratt just refuses to go away (are you shocked? Don’t be.).  His latest famewhore ploy?  Marketing an alleged sex tape he made of himself and possibly estranged, possibly soon-to-be-ex wife Heidi Montag (because who ever knows what’s true with these people?).  Vivid Entertainment co-CEO Steven Hirsch says he’s spoken with The Bearded One about the tape and is planning on flying down to Costa Rica to talk it over with The Plastic One.  Heidi is publically anti-sex tape release, possibly not realizing how Paris Hilton’s and Kim Kardashian’s tapes rocketed both Paris and Kim to previously unheard-of levels of fame.  Also in Spencer’s greedy little hands?  Another sex tape, this one of Heidi and Playboy Playmate Karissa Shannon.  Radar Online breaks down why this is all a scam, suckas!

In other news of people who just can’t help embarrassing themselves all over the place, let’s talk about The Real Housewives of New Jersey housewife Danielle Staub (who, actually, also has a sex tape no one wants to see).  She fancies herself a singer!  And even went on WPIX11 this morning to prove it, in a very karaoke kind of a way.  With club beats.  And dancers.  Oh, the dancers.  Oh, the singing.  Oh, the matchy t-shirts.  Oh, the humanity!  Take a look:

Cringe!!

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Well, shoot, what hasn’t this woman done?  More news from The Real Housewives of News Jersey’s Danielle Staub today, folks.

Following previous reports of previous roles as a stripper, kindapper, extorter, coke whore, prostitute, and sex tape star, Danielle Staub Wikipedia-updaters can add “soap star” to the list.

Witness Staub’s stint on All My Children as Maura, Jackson Montgomery’s dinner date:

And yes, that’s Josh Duhamel breaking up Maura and Jackson’s romantic evening.

That was 2001.  What a difference 8 years makes to a rich lady’s face.

[Source: Dlisted]

Not sure if any of you have been following the drama, but there’s finally a bit of closure in the Danielle Staub sex tape scandal!

The star of Bravo’s The Real Housewives of New Jersey has been granted a temporary restraining order to stop former boyfriend Stephen Zalewski from releasing sexually explicit video footage he took of her.  Staub also filed a lawsuit against Zalewski seeking damages for invasion of privacy, defamation and infliction of emotional distress.

Apparently, she had no idea Zalewski was taping her and found out about it from an article in Star magazine in which he discussed the tape!  Weird!

BTW, if you follow Real Housewives, Zalewski is that 26-year-old (er, “26-year-old”) that Staub was dating briefly on the show.   Peeee-ewwwww!

Totally gross, right?  Thank the heavens we won’t be seeing thumbnails of those two uglies polluting on our Internets anytime soon.

[Source: AP]