Archive for the ‘Saved By the Bell’ Category

Slater Hater Goes a Little Nuts

Posted by Diana in Saved By the Bell

January 13th, 2011, 02:12 PM

Slater: jock, musician, trendsetter

“It’s the end of an era,” quoth Saved by the Bell’s A.C. Slater.  He couldn’t be more right: Mario Lopez may have left Bayside High in order to be Saved by the Baby, but Slater lives on in reruns, internet jokes, and photos.  A Chicago bar aptly named Mullets used to have a framed photo of the beloved mullet wearer over a urinal in the bathroom–until an unruly patron smashed it in a fit of RAGE!  Says the Chicago Tribune, “”I just don’t like Slater,” the man reportedly told the owner after allegedly yanking the photo from its place of pride above a urinal and smashing it on the floor.”

Anyone else getting a Dustin Diamond vibe from this news item?  Where’s Screech these days?  Does anyone even care?

Screech in the carefree days of yore

Dustin Diamond’s Saved By the Bell Tell-All, in Short

Posted by KAT in Saved By the Bell, Saved By the Bell: The College Years

January 27th, 2010, 12:58 PM

Saved By the Bell: Mark-Paul Gosselaar as Zack Morris, Dustin Diamond as Screech Powers, Mario Lopez as A.C. SlaterBy now, we all know Dustin Diamond wrote a tell-all book about his years on Saved By the Bell called Behind the Bell that simultaneously grossed us out and made us sad.  Not that anyone actually read it.

Except for this 11 Points contributor!  You should really check out the long, long list of highlights (eleven, in fact!) they’ve put together, but in the meantime, let me condense them for you in a mostly SFW fashion so you can see if it’s worth your time:

1) Dustin has had sex with over 2,000 women and is well-endowed.  Dustin is no Screech Powers.
2) Mario Lopez (a.k.a. A.C. Slater) raped a girl, and NBC paid her to keep quiet.
3) Tiffani Thiessen (Kelly Kapowski) was dating Eddie Garcia, the actor who played Johnny Dakota in the anti-drug episode, while having relations with both Mark-Paul Gosselaar (Zack Morris) and Mario Lopez at the same time.
4) The entire cast was smoking weed during the said anti-drug episode (”Theres no hope with dope!”).
5) Elizabeth Berkley (Jessie Spano) also had relations with both Mark-Paul Gosselaar and Mario Lopez.
6) Lark Voorhies (Lisa Turtle) also had relations with both Mark-Paul Gosselaar and Mario Lopez.
7) Martin Lawrence was abusive to Lark Voorhies when they were engaged (Whoa! Never knew they were together).
8 ) Dustin had sex with Linda Mancuso, NBC’s VP of children’s programming.
9) Mark-Paul Gosselaar confessed to the cast that he had used steroids before Saved By the Bell: The College Years.
10) Ed Alonzo (a.k.a. Max, owner of The Max) used to practice magic tricks with a young Neil Patrick Harris and also get sexy with him.
11) Executive Producer Peter Engel (you’ve seen the name!) used to have threesomes with Tiffani Thiessen and Mark-Paul Gosselaar in his office.

That’s all he wrote.  Only Mr. Belding remains unscathed!

Okay, so not to be a total Pollyanna, but I’m assuming just about all this is made up.  For one, these lies aren’t even creative.  They basically amount to: everyone had sex with each other.  And even if it DID happen, who cares?  Dustin Diamond is quite simply continuing to reveal himself as the insecure, bitter has-been that we already knew he was.

So the question remains: should we read this?  Nah.

[Source: 11 Points via ONTD]

Screech Powers Bums Out Kelly Kapowski

Posted by KAT in Saved By the Bell

October 22nd, 2009, 10:36 AM

So you know how Dustin Diamond bums us all out?  Guess what!  He has the same affect on former Saved By the Bell castmate Tiffani Thiessen!

Saved By the Bell: Kelly KapowskiSaved By the Bell: Screech Powers

Here’s what Kelly Kapowski had to say about Screech Powers in a recent interview with TV Guide:

“I feel so sad for him. I dont think he’s had the right direction. We’re all working and he’s not. I think people can see that, and that’s what’s sad about it.”

Aw.  She’s totally right.  Dustin Diamond isn’t as marketable as the other cast members (read: unattractive), so he’s clearly having a tough time finding jobs.  In fact, has he ever played a character other than Screech or himself?

My advice to Dustin: quit acting/being a douche and become a real-life nerd already!  Child actresses Mayim Bialik and Danica McKeller, for example, both dropped acting for some time to become crazy smart.  If you’re gonna look helluv dorky, you might as well be helluv smart, too.

Though it may be too late for Dustin Diamond.  This dude’s dumb as bricks.

[Source: Perez]

Dustin Diamond: Worst Person Ever

Posted by KAT in Saved By the Bell

October 1st, 2009, 02:33 PM

Zoinks!  If you haven’t already figured out a reason to dislike actor Dustin Diamond (Screech Powers on the beloved Saved By The Bell), here’s a pretty good one.

Here he is on Fox 5, promoting his new book, Behind the Bell, and reminiscing about the good ole days:

So, so terrible and sad.  This is what happens when you miss out on childhood, people!

[Source: Evil Beet]

Zack Morris Hits the Late Night Circuit

Posted by KAT in Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, Saved By the Bell

June 9th, 2009, 02:19 PM

If you happened to watch Late Night with Jimmy Fallon last night, you were lucky enough to witness one of the most wonderful moments of our time.

You know what I’m talking about, reader.  Jimmy’s guest just happened to be none other than Saved By the Bells Zack Morris.

No, not Saved By the Bell’s Mark-Paul Gosselaar, dummy.  We’re talking straight ZACK MORRIS, no chaser!

The Zackster not only showed up, broke the fourth wall, called a time out, and pulled out his giant cell phone, but performed Zack Attack’s hit single “Friends Forever” with house band The Roots to boot.  And so much more!

You’d have to see it to believe it:

Magic.  The Attic?  Stacey Carosi?  1502? Johnny Dakota? Everything about that was flawless.  This must be what born-again Christians feel like.

And that Zack hasn’t aged a bit!

As you’ll recall, Jimmy Fallon is petitioning to get the entire original cast of Saved By the Bell to reunite on Late Night in honor of the show’s 20th anniversary.  So far he’s locked down everyone but Tiffani Thiessen (Kelly Kapowski) and Dustin Diamond (Screech Powers). Screech we could do without, but what’s a party without Kelly Kapowski?

Seriously, if her dad loses his job and makes her miss ANOTHER major social event, I’m calling bullshizz!

Saved By the Bell Saved By the Jimmy Fallon?

Posted by KAT in Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, Saved By the Bell

April 6th, 2009, 05:06 PM

Holy moly!  How come no one told us about THIS:

Yep.  Jimmy Fallon is trying to get the entire original cast of Saved By the Bell to reunite on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, in honor of the show’s 20th anniversary.

Mr. Belding will clearly take part, as per the video clip above.  And I think we can safely count Dustin Diamond (Screech) in - what else has he got going on (besides financial troubles!)?

Mark-Paul Goselaar (Zack) and Mario Lopez (Slater) I could go either way on, and I’m not expecting to see any of the girls any time soon.  Throw us a bone, Kelly Kapowski!

So basically, per my expert assessment of the situation, the only ones we can count on are Mr. Belding and Screech.  Ugh.  Bummer scene.

What is this, Saved By the Bell: The New Class? Yechhh!

Go big or go home, am I right? Sign the online petition here, on Fallon’s blog, and cross yer fingers and toes!

Saved By The Cell

Posted by KAT in Saved By the Bell

March 6th, 2009, 04:35 PM

This great post on the OMG blog re: ginormous cell phones had me reminiscing about the greatest cell phone user of all time: Zack Morris of Saved By The Bell.

Saved By The Bell: Zack Morris Phone

For those of you not in the know, Zack Morris single-handedly changed the face of cell phone use in the early ’90s.  In that he had one.  And it was huge.

Teen Line, this is Nitro…

Hot Sundaes Meltdown on Saved By the Bell

Posted by ERIN in Saved By the Bell

January 30th, 2009, 04:33 PM

Saved By the Bell Jessie's Song I'm so excitedThe Hot Sundaes are the 1.5-hit-wonder girl group of Jessie Spano, Kelly Kapowski and Lisa Turtle on Saved By the Bell!

Besides covering the Pointer Sisters’ “I’m So Excited” many a time, they’re also probs most notable for the peppy single “Break a Sweat (Go for It)” …and sparking Jessie’s caffeine pill addiction/nervous breakdown (because there was never any time and she just had to get into Stanford!).

Nevertheless, the Hot Sundaes’ music video was nothing short of a jazzercising inspiration to young girls across this great nation during the 90’s.

It’s a piece of work: the way they SHOUT-SING THE WHOLE SONG; dated special effects (abrupt leotard changes, double exposure close-ups, herky-jerky slo-mo); the actresses’ genuine commitment; and just the overall absurdity of a song which (unsuccessfully) tries to bridge the themes of aerobics and falling in love. Utter NONSENSE!

We all assumed these Saved By the Bell vixens would shoot to the tippy-top of stardom, but it’s probably more appropriate to say they’ve all “achieved modest notoriety”. Here’s where the Hot Sundae gals are today:

Elizabeth Berkley (Jessie Spano): Guest-starring in the current season of The L Word as Kelly (seriously?), the “straight girl that got away” from Bette (Jennifer Beals) in college (seriously?). The leads of Showgirls and Flashdance together on-screen? Seems like a dance-off is in order!

Tiffani Thiessen (Kelly Kapowski): Currently working on USA Network’s upcoming series called White Collar as the wife of an FBI Agent played by Tim DeKay (Carnivale). Kay *shrug*.

Lark Voorhies (Lisa Turtle): Appeared in a 2008 suspense thriller film called The Next Hit. Yeah, I didn’t hear about it either. She’s also a musician and releasing a single called “Saturday” (boo, not “Sundae”?) this year.

Put your mind to it and go for it, ladies!

Get Inked! Ridonk Celebrity Tattoos!

Posted by KAT in Judge Judy, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, Saved By the Bell, The Price Is Right, Who's The Boss?

January 16th, 2009, 04:47 PM

Woo!  Friday!

Not too long ago, a friend sent me this awesome Flabbergastedly post on ridiculous tattoos.  Feast your eyes on these puppies and prepare to be amazed!

Here are some of my fave TV-related ones:

Tony Danza tatoo

A tuxed-up Tony Danza of Who’s The Boss? fame!

Zack Morris tattoo

A particularly weasely Zack Morris from Saved By The Bell!

Bob Barker tattoo

A senile Bob Barker, original Price is Right host and pet population-control activist!

Conan O'Brien tattoo

A beautiful Post-Impressionistic homage to Late Night with Conan O’Brien (Paul Cezanne, is that your work?!)!

Judge Judy tattoo

Perma-shout-out to Judge Judy (with optional blood spatter freckles)!


Now, I’m not one to flip my burgers over body art, but if I WERE to get a tattoo, I’d probs get something discrete, classy, and straight up ADORBS.  Probably something like this li’l guy.

Happy weekend, y’all!

Dancin’ Down The Aisle!

Posted by KAT in Dancing With The Stars, Saved By the Bell

January 5th, 2009, 01:53 PM

Maksim Chmerkovskiy & Karina SmirnoffOoh la la!  It’s raining engagements, folks!

Another one bites the dust this week - this time, your favorite pair of Ukrainian cuties from Dancing With The Stars.  Professional dancers Karina Smirnoff and Maksim Chmerkovskiy announced their engagement over the weekend, after just 6 months of dating.  Maksim supposedly popped the question on New Year’s Eve at the Wynn Hotel in Las Vegas.

Congrats to the happy couple!  I must say, I’m not the hugest fan of Maksim, who famously pointed fingers at all the DWTS dancers he thought had too much junk in the trunk.  However, he DOES seem to be a step up from over-dimpled Saved By the Bell alum Mario Lopez, Karina’s ex and rumored cheat!  Nice upgrade, girl!

More power to ya, Karina!  Good luck!

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