Gossip Girl S03E07: How to Succeed in Bassness
Posted by KAT in Gossip GirlOctober 27th, 2009, 11:32 AM
Oh, Gossip Girl, what have you become? I can’t keep up with all this.
Last night’s episode concerned itself with the opening of Chuck Bass’s club, Gimlet. Chuck wants to keep the club’s opening a secret from gf Blair Waldorf, who he’s still pissed at for betraying his trust last week, but he asks Serena van der Woodsen to help with club publicity, since she’s like, a publicist now. Serena takes on the project, hoping to impress boss Casey (er, now it sounds like it’s K.C.?) with a successful party.
Unfortch, Serena’s boss Casey / K.C. gets her panties in a bunch over Serena using her contacts to publicize the party, but cools down when Serena assures her she will have Olivia Burke there, canoodling with ex-bf and Endless Knights co-star Patrick Roberts, another client of Casey’s.
But this whole pretend-we’re-dating-for-publicity thing isn’t sitting well with Olivia’s bf Dan Humphrey, who recently viewed the Endless Knights series, per buddy Nate Archibald’s suggestion, and discovered Olivia’s steamy vampire love scenes, in which co-star Patrick arouses Olivia to the point of levitation. Whoa! Olivia discovers Dan’s insecurities and assures him that what he saw was acting, that her and Patrick’s relationship was just for show. She agrees to go to Serena’s event and pretend to be with Patrick, however - it’s all part of the job.
Meanwhile, Chuck is getting nervous about Gimlet’s liquor license - it still hasn’t arrived. He finally gets a call at the last minute that he’s been approved, and we later find out that control-freak Blair had called in a favor to Uncle Jack Bass (remember him?) to make it happen. Chuck, of course, finds out, and gets even more pissed at the girl. He asks her to leave and not come to the launch party.
Party time! Serena’s working the door, everyone’s having a ball… and Blair’s stuck at home playing chess with Dorota.
Suddenly, flowers arrive at her dorm room! They’re from Uncle Jack, sending his condolences for granting them a fake liquor license. Oh noes! The girl heads straight to Gimlet to warn Chuck.
But Chuck already knows. The pair kiss and make up and blah blah blah call the cops in order to break up the illegal party and wind up on page one of the newspaper.
Serena is not particularly pleased. The paparazzi hadn’t got a shot of Olivia and Patrick back together - Casey / K.C. would be furious!
Olivia had confessed to Dan that she had, in fact, broken Patrick’s heart, and was just trying to help his long-suffering career by giving him a bit of publicity - but she decides to stick by Dan’s side instead during the event. Serena comes up with a quick fix for the problem, which is to have the paps photograph Olivia kissing Dan and Serena kissing Patrick. The amount of coverage generated seems to please Casey / K.C., and Serena’s job is safe once again.
All the while, Jenny Humphrey’s busy with her own storyline! She’s acting like a huge bitch as Queen Bee, and even has her minions dump yogurt on step-brother Eric van der Woodsen’s head after he and boyfriend Jonathan sit higher than her on the stairs.
Even worse, after a talking-to from step-mom Lily van der Woodsen, Li’l J makes up with Eric, but has to continue to get her revenge on him and Jonathan in order to show the girls on the steps who’s boss. This ends with the minions egging Jonathan, Eric being pissed beyond belief and telling Li’l J he wants nothing to do with her, and Li’l J dramatically tearing clothes out of her closet and throwing them on the floor of her room, along with her sewing machine. Is she shunning her D.I.Y. garb and committing herself to a life of being a huge bitch in designer pantsuits? Probs.
Oh, and there’s some boring subplot about Rufus Humphrey wanting to stay home and pass out candy in wife Lily’s apt, and her paying the doorman to usher some kids up and satisfy the dude. SNOOZE!
Sure, I guess the episode was entertaining enough. But really, if the show continues on this downward spiral, I’m not sure I can stomach any more! Who’s with me?
Gossip Girl, are you there?
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